If last week’s finale didn’t provide enough crackly fireworks for you, the Real Housewives of New Jersey two-part reunion is sure to. I mean, Andy Cohen is going to get PUSHED. But first, without the knowledge that we have, Andy Cohen wants to begin by talking about New Jersey, “so have you heard about Jersey Shore?” Poor Garden State, everything it did for New Jersey has been erased.
Sparks
Completely out of the blue, Teresa begins attacking Danielle and calling her a pig. Like, seriously, immediately. Andy Cohen tries to lighten things up with a clip package about what idiots the New Jersey Housewives are and how they pronounce words incorrectly but the air is already so icy they can see their breath.
Next we remember how Jacqueline and Teresa had babies and Dina left the show. So, going back to last season’s reunion, what did Danielle do to Dina that was such a big stink? Apparently it was trying to Dina’s daughter away from her. Then Danielle’s attorneys put a silence on Dina, allegedly. Housewives, take it from here! Andy looks lost.
Explosion
Out of nowhere (I watched it three times and cannot pinpoint the trigger), Teresa steps toward Danielle screaming hysterically: “DO NOT BREAK OUT MY FAMILY, YOU F***ING B*TCH!” Over and over again. She cursed at Danielle, Danielle walked away, Andy Cohen tried to put Teresa back on her couch and she PUSHED him, yelling at Danielle that she is a piece of garbage. This tirade made Teresa look SO heavily medicated, especially the roar at the end when Caroline grabbed her. There is something very disturbing going on behind those cold, dead eyes. I don’t even know what is going on.
“You better get her back here, ANDY,” Teresa yells offstage. Teresa and Danielle both threaten not to continue and Andy Cohen tells Teresa she can’t get back off the couch (because he obviously has so much control over the situation). “You’re strong!” Andy marvels at Teresa. He is scared of her, and so am I.
Moving Forward . . . Slowly
Andy attempts another baby-related question but it quickly disintegrates into Jacqueline and Danielle yelling at each other.
